Feelings

Today, I arrived back in Romford. Not entirely successfully. I pretty much cried all the way back on the train, then cried again this evening, Throughout the whole of a Christmas carol. And why? well who knows. I think it was a combination of not wanting Christmas to be over, not wanting to go back to romford and do temping jobs again, and being a bit over tired. Also I find this time of year quite difficult, we as a family have had a few very bad late Decembers/early Januarys, and if truth be told, I am a bit afraid of leaving everybody at this time. I hope all will be well this year, but I have a bad feeling, hopefully I am wrong and all will be well...

Panto Tour

Well with three days left of the tour and only nine performances left to do, it's probably a good time to write about it. It has been an experience for sure. We have been touring around community centres, care homes and social clubs. And when I found out I would be touring to mainly old people in nursing homes I thought I would hate it, but in fact it has been one of the most rewarding things I have ever done. We have been working six days a week with three performances a day, and all the travel in between. So it has been knackering. But was has struck me is just how much audiences get out of these performances. Yes we have had a few people who haven't exactly enjoyed it, but you'd probably get that anywhere. Most people are just really happy that people have come to entertain them, and give them some time. We have had some lovely comments, and some hilarious ones, but I will save them for another time.

What I have found quite reassuring about visiting lots of care homes, is that there are some really good ones. There are also some really bad ones. But for a person who is so used to looking forward to the future, to suddenly be flung into somewhere where there isn't much of a future, they are literally at the end. I have found it quite hard to begin with. But I suppose old age comes to us all in the end. And maybe it's not too much of a bad thing to really think about how you might want to live out your last few days. There are some truly excellent homes, in lovely houses with people who really care. I have been quite touched by there generosity, one home even gave us a big tin of celebrations...nom. Of course nobody wants to end up in a home, but take it from someone with VERY high standards when it comes to things like these, there are some excellent ones in the west and north Yorkshire area, For family members or even yourself, give me a bell and I'll give you the low down on some of them if you're interested.

Anywhoo, in conclusion I have loved the tour, and really want to get some more acting work in the new year, I have loved it.

Merry Christmas.

Panto Time

'Panto time is here again'...but this time it's my actual Job. YAY. We start rehearsals tomorrow and start touring on Saturday, which is all very exciting and after three months of mind numbingly boring day jobs I am more than ready for the challenge. HOWEVER...I have lost my voice, and with seven solos and two or three shows a day, I am slightly concerned. I am hoping that my voice will be back in time for performances, but who knows. Then again judging by how this year has gone in general nothing has been simple so maybe this is yet another hiccough that i am going to have to get through.

I am back at my parents house at the moment as the Panto is in Leeds. So I have had to leave my little flat in Romford till after Xmas. Which is strange, I like my life in London it's fun and comfy, and for the first time when I came up on the train on Saturday and looked out of the window at the terraced houses, fields and fog, the North did not feel like home. Later I went to the Playhouse that i used to be part of in Pateley Bridge, and again for the first time, I couldn't wait to leave. I didn't like the play, I found the people to be small minded, and I felt too big for the space. A little bit like when you go back to your primary school, you remember everything to be a lot bigger, but through adult eyes it looks small. I remember a time when I tried so hard to become a part of that Playhouse but now it's just part of my childhood. I haven't been in a play there since I went to University in 2007, and since then I have finished my degree, finished drama school and had a couple of years of living as an actor. and although I have been back numerous times since 2007, this time it felt different. Or maybe it is the same and I am different, either way It's not for Sarah any more.

Anywho in other news I went to see Nativity 2 on Friday, it's not as good as the first one but worth a go. Here's a song from the first one to get you in a christmassy mood:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NiJCVlf4IE0

Birthday for the 24th time

Yesterday marked my 24th Birthday, and to be honest I'm not sure what to think about it. I think 24 is still young? yeah 24 is still young. I have felt really alive and completely exhausted this week all at the same time, in fact today I phoned in sick to one of my nursery postings. I had a couple of days booked off this week anyway, and I figured one more wouldn't do any harm. Plus, I worked out that after this week my next day off will be Christmas day, which is a rather sobering thought. And also as I have a rather long acting assignment coming up, I don't want to become run down before I have even started it.

Also rather excitingly I have my birthday party to execute, which this year is a murder mystery night. I need to buy the food, decorate the room, organise the running of the actual murder thing and decorate myself all by Saturday night. But I am excited about it, and I have some ace people coming, actors mainly who will be spiffing.

My parents came down to visit me yesterday and brought all my presents down, I felt very spoilt. I am so fortunate to have so many people who actually give a damn about me. This year in many respects has been quite difficult for me, so it's nice to feel as though I am moving forward and that I have the backing of all these lovely and generous people. long live the big family.

yes life is nice at the moment...

We're just ordinary people

Last night i met people i trained to be an actor with. It was strange and nice all at the same time. Most of the time i don't see other actors which consequently means i end up spending a lot of time with people that  aren't actors, which is good, but i do feel bit of an outsider. A lot of the work i do is temporary cover, which means that i go to a lot of workplaces where people don't really know how to treat me and when i tell them i'm an actor they are interested but i can tell they don't really get it, which is fine, i don't really expect them to get it. But being back with actors is nice, hearing about their day jobs, and what little acting tidbits they have found. Also it is nice to be around people who understand the temping thing, you don't have to pretend it's fine around those people, you can just be and compare stories. It is also nice to know that i am still on a parr with them all, no better , no worse. which is great. Again being away from acting peeps, i lose sight of how i'm doing. And it's very easy to think that everybody is doing better. Not the case.

Quiet enough to blog

Hello, long time no speak. I haven't been blogging very much recently, not sure why. I have actually been working quite a lot lately. Doing various temping things on reception, a bit of admin, and some events stuff. I was at the classical Brit awards on Tuesday, waitressing. I'm not mad keen on the events thing, I don't really like working evenings, but at least the jobs are interesting and invariably there is someone famous there, which is fun, I saw Andrew Lloyd Webber on Tuesday.

I have also got another acting job lined up for November, it's a short film, and it's paid which is very exciting.  I am currently trying to collect footage from the other short films that I have featured in, so that I can get my showreel together. This is proving to be a bit tricky. I am also attempting to do my tax return this week, which is also proving to be a bit tricky , as I have never done one before, I'm not really sure if I'm doing right...eek.

I am currently on my own in the flat as I am working in the evening today and my flatmates are working in the day. Which is nice. It's given me a bit of space to think. You know that phrase 'I couldn't even hear myself think' that's how I feel sometimes. I very often come home after everyone else, and when they are in the T.V. is always on, usually with them watching something mind numbing, or with a heavy laughter track. Don't get me wrong I don't mind a bit of mind numbing T.V. but not all the time....and I HATE stuff with laughter tracks on it, they are the worst...ergh. I had a bit of a blow out last night, I wasn't even in that bad a mood, I just wanted to be away from people. And when I got in the T.V. was blaring out, one of my flatmates was cooking, even though she got home an hour before me, so why she couldn't have cooked then i don't know, also she was using my baking tray, meaning that I couldn't even cook at the same time. These are petty things, but sometimes I just need space, and quiet.

Anyway, aside from all that things are actually okay at the moment, I still have no money, but hey ho, no change there, and I would like a slightly more active social life but small steps, I'm sure these things will come.

I'm going to get Glastonbury tickets at the weekend, well I hope too anyway, and that will give me something to look forward too. yay.

Right I best decide what I am going to eat before my shift tonight.

Toodles.

Acting up

Well hasn't it been a long time since i have blogged. I think i felt like i was being a little too moany to write a good blog, and became a bit disenchanted by the whole thing. I haven't read back any of my last few posts so i can't really remember what i blogged about last, anywho i shall update you with all the recent goings on and try not to moan too much in the process.

I HAVE GOT AN ACTING JOB...(insert hallelujah music here)...I will be playing Puss in 'Puss in boots' in a touring panto around Leeds. Soooo excited i received the script and the contract yesterday, so it is deffo happening. It lasts throughout the whole of December and i couldn't be more pleased. an actual paid proper acting jobby...fabsticks!

I HAVE ALSO GOT AN ADMIN JOB...it's only two days a week but hey, at least I'm not totally poor now...I'm working for scania...you know the lorry people...doing filing and data entry and such like...and the ladies in the office are very nice...thank god.

I HAVE GOT ANOTHER JOB DOING EVENTS...I'm not sure how much I'm allowed to tell you about this one as i had to sign a contract to say that i wouldn't disclose info about famous people and all that. and as last night i was working at the Royal Albert hall in the VIP room there were famous people there...one of them i did not like so i didn't offer him a canape...ha...so there...that was my tiny revenge for what he's done to the economy...(you can probably work out who he is from that)...

In personal news as i am now doing more, as are the peeps in my flat it is slowly getting better...I am not good when i feel trapped, especially around the same people...i like a bit of freedom...and the chance to move around...i don't cope well with monotony...any how we shall see...

umm yeah, so i think that is the main stuff covered...oo i was thinking about starting a new blog...although as I'm not great at keeping up with this one maybe it is not such a good plan...I'll let you know if i decide to....

toodles