Life is a marathon not a sprint

Sunday, whoop. And my only day for a lay in. Yesterday I had an audition for providing children's parties and preschool classes in drama. All good fun, and would be a little extra cash. But it meant me missing my Saturday lay in. I have no money again, as I work on 0% contract I only get paid for the hours that i do, and unfortunately a couple of weeks ago I was very Ill and had to miss 2 1/2 days of work. Such is life, so I missed out on the pay, so have gone over my overdraft once again, which means I will probably get a whopping bank charge which I won't be able to pay, and will have to revert to the bank of mum and dad. Sigh. 

Apart from the money thing. I am actually feeling incredibly positive. I seem to be in control of my life in a way that i really wasn't last year. I have a fairly (touch wood) stable day job, which although doesn't pay great, does pay some, so i can just about keep my head above water most weeks. I am starting to create my own work, with a really good friend from drama school. I am applying for more corporate acting work with other companies. And I am applying for acting work, as well  Also I am going out more, seeing people, enjoying London. We are about to renew the contract on our flat down here, and i couldn't be happier about that. I feel like that is an achievement in itself, all three of us managed to survive a whole year down here relatively unscathed. It was a stressful year, and not exactly an easy ride, but hey we made it. I think we'll have a proper celebration when it is actually the date we moved in, but for now, getting the new contracts through felt like a real achievement.

positivity

I am having one of the most lovely weekends that I have had in a long
Time. I am currently sat in the hairdressers which always puts me in a
Good mood. But also have seen lots of friends this weekend, with still
A few more to visit. I went to the southbank centre to do some comedy
Writing with  friend a and what a vibrant place that is. It totally tickled my fancy
. It's just so nice to be round creative minds, and to remember what my
Creative mind consists of. I can be a bit strange, I know that, but I always
Feel so much better when I can show people what's going on in my head
Through performance. It's actually quite life affirming to me.
I have also just got over....

N.B. I actually wrote this post a week ago, on my blackberry, but it stopped working mid sentence  so I have no idea what the rest of this post was going to be...but i thought i'd share the thoughts anywhay.

blogging on the train

well hello blog fans I am writing this on the train back up to Yorkshire, who'd have funk it! Technology ey?

Well I thought it was about time for an update, so I think I left you last feeling a bit down about coming back to London, well the following week I came down with a very odd illness, which seemed to involve being very tired and getting a slight chest infection. luckily my immune system kicked it, and now I'm back to my usual non cryie self. phew.

This month I have been applying like crazy for any and all acting jobs. I have had four auditions mainly for paid work, all very different jobs one was a Chekhov Play, one a TIE tour one was an adult panto, and another for a new children's TV prog. All very interesting and good to get back into the auditioning habit. I had become a bit lazy at the end of the last year. Anywhoo, it's a new year and with a renewed sense of purpose for me.

Also, and I am quite excited about this. Me and my lovely Friend Eleanor (from DSL) have met up and we are going to start writing some comedy things and perform them at comedy nights. eee, feels so good to be in control of something creative again.

And I have some corporate acting lined up for Feb. So feel 2013 is going well so far, just hope it stays that way.

Toodle pip.

Treacheries of being alone

I am what may be aptly described as a solitary person; however I want certain things in my life...a partner, being the main one at the moment. And at a risk of sounding desperate I am beginning to succumb to certain treacheries of being alone/single for too long. I cannot be too candid about this as I am fearful of being lynched, but I think I am on the brink of doing something quite bad...emotionally bad I mean. Hmm, this is rather hard to blog about; I am not a person who condones extra relationship affairs. In fact I think if people cheat, it is because they are not happy in the relationship that they are in. I'm not trying to excuse cheating, just understand. Also I am not easily won over or taken in by people...but I am alone and therefore have little to lose, or maybe I have a lot to lose...one things for sure it's very bad karma...I think I need some acting work to distract me.

Feelings

Today, I arrived back in Romford. Not entirely successfully. I pretty much cried all the way back on the train, then cried again this evening, Throughout the whole of a Christmas carol. And why? well who knows. I think it was a combination of not wanting Christmas to be over, not wanting to go back to romford and do temping jobs again, and being a bit over tired. Also I find this time of year quite difficult, we as a family have had a few very bad late Decembers/early Januarys, and if truth be told, I am a bit afraid of leaving everybody at this time. I hope all will be well this year, but I have a bad feeling, hopefully I am wrong and all will be well...

Panto Tour

Well with three days left of the tour and only nine performances left to do, it's probably a good time to write about it. It has been an experience for sure. We have been touring around community centres, care homes and social clubs. And when I found out I would be touring to mainly old people in nursing homes I thought I would hate it, but in fact it has been one of the most rewarding things I have ever done. We have been working six days a week with three performances a day, and all the travel in between. So it has been knackering. But was has struck me is just how much audiences get out of these performances. Yes we have had a few people who haven't exactly enjoyed it, but you'd probably get that anywhere. Most people are just really happy that people have come to entertain them, and give them some time. We have had some lovely comments, and some hilarious ones, but I will save them for another time.

What I have found quite reassuring about visiting lots of care homes, is that there are some really good ones. There are also some really bad ones. But for a person who is so used to looking forward to the future, to suddenly be flung into somewhere where there isn't much of a future, they are literally at the end. I have found it quite hard to begin with. But I suppose old age comes to us all in the end. And maybe it's not too much of a bad thing to really think about how you might want to live out your last few days. There are some truly excellent homes, in lovely houses with people who really care. I have been quite touched by there generosity, one home even gave us a big tin of celebrations...nom. Of course nobody wants to end up in a home, but take it from someone with VERY high standards when it comes to things like these, there are some excellent ones in the west and north Yorkshire area, For family members or even yourself, give me a bell and I'll give you the low down on some of them if you're interested.

Anywhoo, in conclusion I have loved the tour, and really want to get some more acting work in the new year, I have loved it.

Merry Christmas.

Panto Time

'Panto time is here again'...but this time it's my actual Job. YAY. We start rehearsals tomorrow and start touring on Saturday, which is all very exciting and after three months of mind numbingly boring day jobs I am more than ready for the challenge. HOWEVER...I have lost my voice, and with seven solos and two or three shows a day, I am slightly concerned. I am hoping that my voice will be back in time for performances, but who knows. Then again judging by how this year has gone in general nothing has been simple so maybe this is yet another hiccough that i am going to have to get through.

I am back at my parents house at the moment as the Panto is in Leeds. So I have had to leave my little flat in Romford till after Xmas. Which is strange, I like my life in London it's fun and comfy, and for the first time when I came up on the train on Saturday and looked out of the window at the terraced houses, fields and fog, the North did not feel like home. Later I went to the Playhouse that i used to be part of in Pateley Bridge, and again for the first time, I couldn't wait to leave. I didn't like the play, I found the people to be small minded, and I felt too big for the space. A little bit like when you go back to your primary school, you remember everything to be a lot bigger, but through adult eyes it looks small. I remember a time when I tried so hard to become a part of that Playhouse but now it's just part of my childhood. I haven't been in a play there since I went to University in 2007, and since then I have finished my degree, finished drama school and had a couple of years of living as an actor. and although I have been back numerous times since 2007, this time it felt different. Or maybe it is the same and I am different, either way It's not for Sarah any more.

Anywho in other news I went to see Nativity 2 on Friday, it's not as good as the first one but worth a go. Here's a song from the first one to get you in a christmassy mood:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NiJCVlf4IE0