I'm allergic to Penicillin

I'm allergic to penicillin. I have to tell everyone I know, and even don't know. In case anyone tries to give me penicillin, thinking it will make me better, when it won't. It’ll just make me spotty and itchy, like I am now. It would be hard to feel any less attractive than I do right now. Meh. The biggest shame about being allergic to Penicillin is that, how penicillin works and how it was discovered Is pretty much the only thing I remember from science and history at school? I thought it was fascinating how by just leaving a bit of mould out on the side, could end up saving so many people's lives...well not mine apparently. That’s yet another childhood dream that has been dashed. I watched a programme last week, where someone brought up the idea of letting go of childhood dreams of what your life would become and dealing with the reality of it. This was somewhat poignant for me. Maybe because my career is so silly, or that I thought I would have met someone by now, that I could at least imagine spending my life with. I don't know, the reality of growing up is starting to hit. Really I just need money, but to get money I need a job, and to get a job I need to be committed, and to be committed I can't be pootling off to every audition that comes my way....and the list continues. I've just had to have a rather frank chat with the future flat mates about room situations. The same old who’s going to get the small room debate. I tried to deal with it in adult way, but it just feels like being back at school. I don't like petty behaviour or people pretending that they're fine with something when they're not. Probably because I am not one of those people. One of my saving graces/slightly bad things about my personality is not being able to do or even say something that I don't either believe in or want to do. If I don't want to do something or can't see the point in it, I won't do it. I can't even pretend to do it, it just won't happen. And I expect others to be the same. How can people do and say things they don't believe in? Surely that's lying? And again this brings me back to childhood feeling like a liar I just can't do it. I get riddled with guilt, until I put it right...sad but true...and I expect the same of others. Especially as we get older. anywhoo it has been sorted now, and when I say sorted I mean staying as it originally was. because another thing that I strongly believe is if you say you’re going to do something you have to follow through, even if that means making a bed and then laying in it. Literally in this case. Hmm, yeah so don't give me penicillin, even if you are trying to save my life.